Why I Need Breakfast in the Morning

Today I started out the day in a great mood, however, now at the late hour of 9:00am, I am ornery.

To be very frank, I hate lazy idiots! Sadly, there is nearly an entire team of arrogant, idiotic salesmen in my company who don't know how to use their brains effectively. For instance, this morning I get an email from a sales rep who wants to know the venue information of an upcoming training. That information is on our website, but whatever, so I tell him the name. I get a response back asking for the address, phone and website of said venue. HELLO!?! Do you not have the internet? In the time it took him to write the response he could have Googled it and found it himself (which is what I had to do to find the info).

I was very close to asking him if I needed to send an IT guy down to fix his internet. Instead I restrained myself and said "Everything is online and very easy to find, however, here it is:" Hopefully he read between the lines and saw that HE IS AN IDIOT, but because he is an idiot, he probably didn't see anything wrong with what he did.

Ugh. As a warning to you all: if you have a really stupid question to ask me that you could easily find the answer to yourself, do not even think of wasting my time, especially before I've eaten breakfast.

To Kiss and Tell

There has been quite a bit activity in my family regarding boyfriends, girlfriends, and dating in general. The biggest gossip concerns my youngest sister who has a new "boyfriend-ish guy" and had her first kiss this week.

When I talked with Nattie about her first kiss, I asked her how it was, did he have bad breath, were his lips chapped, was he sloppy? It was immediately obvious that I had kissed some losers in the past. I loved her answer though, so typical of the first kiss la-la land, "It was really good. I didn't notice anything else."

I have had some first kiss drama myself. On high school graduation day, we had a big party, like most schools do. A boy I had been friends with and with whom I had gone on several dates was there. We spent a good hour just talking on the grass. As the night waned on, I was getting more tired, but also more giddy/crazy (think: teenager). My friends were watching us from a distance and this guy thought it would be funny to stage kiss and then pretend we had really kissed. I personally thought it would be funnier to actually kiss, but I didn't say that. So, because I was silly and wanted him to like me, I agreed. He made me promise not to tell my friends it was a fake. Looking back, I totally don't get why we did it. The next morning my friends were all gabbing about our kiss when my friend Mel pulled me aside, looked me in the eye, and said, "You are a liar." And because I'm not a very good liar, my secret was out.

My actual first kiss was when I was a sophomore in college. I was 19 and completely flattered by a guy I had been dating for about 2 weeks. After one of those long days at school, he walked me to my car and kissed me. I thought it was good at the time, but 2 weeks later I wished I had never kissed him.

I like the story of my husband's first kiss best. We were on our first date and had spent the entire afternoon and evening together. We had taken a walk around campus and had ended up sitting on the bench by the bell tower. Alexander was sharing his heartache about his mom and family and I was overwhelmed at some of the things I felt comfortable enough to share with him. At one point we grew quiet, his arm around me as he stared off into the valley of lights. Suddenly, he turned and kissed me right on the lips. I was surprised and I distinctly remember the thought crossing my mind, "Do I want to be kissing him? Yes, yes, I do!" When we pulled apart, he got a shy grin on his face and said, "Well, I've never done that before".

"What?" I asked, "Never kissed someone on a first date before?"

"No, I mean, I've never kissed a girl at all before". Frankly, I was flabbergasted because his kiss was really nice. Not sloppy, not too long or too short, no chapped lips or bad breath, just really nice. I think that's why I married him. ;)

I think I would like again to experience that rush of adrenaline, of surprise, glee, adoration, joy, and giddiness that comes to a girl the first time she kisses a man she really likes. While I love every single kiss my darling husband gives me, it doesn't carry the same feeling of miraculous anxiety that our first kiss together did.

This quote brings that feeling to life again:

I ran up the door, opened the stairs, said my pajamas and put on my prayers - turned off my bed, tumbled into my light, and all because he kissed me good-night! ~Author Unknown

Merry Christmas!

Yes, I know I am a bit late. It still counts though, right?

Christmas was wonderful, as usual. We got the tree up soon after Thanksgiving and I decided that I must be getting better at my decorating job, as it only took me less than 2 hours to transform my house into a winter wonderland, tree and all.



We were unusually busy this month, with something going on every weekend. We were asked to decorate the ward Christmas party, which shouldn't have been hard, but it was. Alexander was also the guest of honor that night as he was transformed into Santa Claus. I made the suit and was actually quite surprised at how good he looked! Oh, and most of the kids loved him. ;)






On Tuesday, Dec 22, we decided to keep one of the puppies from my parent's dog. Alexander must really love me a lot, because he wasn't too thrilled about the idea. The puppy adds quite a bit of excitement to our quiet home and it will take a some time to get used to her. Alexander named her Lady Godiva and she has been a pretty good pup, all things considering. Right now we are working on teaching her to do her business outside, don't nip or bite, and not to chew on cords, shoes, etc. She is learning fairly quickly and with a little bit of time she will be a very good dog.





We spent Christmas Eve visiting my grandparents and singing carols together. I think this is a nice tradition that we should continue. Plus, they loved the puppy, who was so good, she slept the whole time.

Christmas morning we slept late and took our time getting ready. I made a nice breakfast and we opened presents, letting Godiva have the wrapping paper. That afternoon we went down to my parent's house for dinner and games.




All around it was a wonderful holiday, and a great relief from work.

Wedding Planner: The person you pay to be stressed out for you

I have been MIA for the past few months. I did think about writing, and then I thought about how I had nothing to say.

Life is going about the same as always for us, busy and crazy. As can tell from the Elegantly Expressed blog, we have had a good amount of weddings. They have all turned out well, though some were more insane than others.

I have been getting more and more into the wedding planning aspect of things. It's much more difficult and requires an insane amount of patience, effort, organization, and time. As I am naturally rather bossy, it works out well. However, the wedding I did on Nov 27 was enough of a challenge to convince me that had I been a novice, I might have died.

For this particular wedding I was hired on towards the end of the planning process as a "day of coordinator". This means that the bride plans everything, gets all her vendors, and does most of it herself but hires someone to make sure everything runs smoothly that day. It usually involves some decoration, some floral design, and a lot of energy. I am truly convinced that this is much more difficult than if I have planned the entire wedding. Even though I'm hired for "one-day", I am not only working the wedding day, but also the whole week before to coordinate schedules with the florist, the cake decorator and the caterers and various other types of prep work.

This wedding day was sort of a mini disaster. I was in charge of decorating tables, chair sashes and overlays, and a chocolate fountain with all its yummy dipping foods. Everything I was supposed to do turned out awesome, but because I wasn't able to recommend my preferred vendors, the ones the bride contracted were sub-par and over-priced.

First case in point: the florist. This supposedly professional florist was paid very well for specific items and to deliver and set-up, but the week before, the florist claimed to not know she was supposed to deliver them. She was going out of town and it was impossible. Let's pause for a moment and discuss professional responsibility: IF YOU TAKE ON A WEDDING, YOU ARE BEING HIRED FOR THAT DAY! YOU SET IT ASIDE IN YOUR SCHEDULE. IF IT CONFLICTS WITH SOMETHING ELSE, DON'T TAKE THAT CLIENT! Okay, excuse my rant. I called the florist and informed her that the flowers would be delivered and I would be expecting them at 4:00. She could not refuse.

The flowers arrived at 4:00, delivered by the florist's sister who knew next to nothing of what she was doing. She expected me to put all the centerpieces together, but I didn't get paid for that nor did I have the time so I kindly asked her if she could take care of it. She spent the next hour on the phone as her sister walked her through everything she was supposed to do. I thought the flowers looked good (not knowing was was expected by the bride) and sent her on her way. Soon after, the mother of the bride arrived and promptly freaked out about the centerpieces. They were supposed to have 6 calla lilies in each of them. Instead, they had 3 callas and a huge bunch of bear grass. I explained that I would be happy to help if desired, but there was little I could do about missing flowers.

Ten minutes later I get called away from my current work again because there was no cake topper. They had ordered a cake topper of white flowers but the florist hadn't brought one. I had to create something for it so I rounded up a couple of spare flowers and created an elegant topper. I was actually amazed that it looked as good as it did.

The caterers in the kitchen had no idea what they were doing and had brought none of their own equipment. They kept asking me where various things were and if I had any of what they needed. That frustrated me because I was also catering the chocolate fountain portion and I always bring everything I will need with me. Then, they left early before everyone had a chance to eat and took all the food with them. I couldn't believe it.

Because this was a Hispanic wedding, a Mariachi band was hired, but the singer's mic was way too loud and he was always flat. I had a headache within minutes. Oh, and to top it all off, during the dancing, the DJ got super annoying by cutting out in the middle of EVERY song and making people sing a couple lines A Capella. I can understand the occasional YMCA, but after ten songs like this, it gets really old.

Despite the drama, the actual reception went really well. The mother of the bride was so pleased with my staff and I that she gave us a very large tip. However, the next morning I awoke with a very nasty cold, obviously the result of stress. Such is my life.

My next wedding is a bit of a risk for me in a number of ways, but we can discuss that later. In the meantime we will just cross our fingers. :)

Random Ramblings

Today I am sooo tired! I just want to crawl back into bed and cuddle with my sweet husband. There's no real reason for the tiredness, a sure sign I am getting old.
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Last night I went to a viewing of my Grandma's sister. It reminded me all over again why I avoid my father's side of the family. Oh, and as a side-note, I am so sick of my younger cousin being the favorite simply because she was stupid enough to get pregnant at 19 and has a little baby. While attempting to speak with my grandparents, my grandma ignored me and began to tell the woman next to her about her granddaughter who just had a baby. Ugh!
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I am in charge of the Elders Quorum activity (one of those wifely-support callings). I decided we will have a Halloween Carnival. I am in the process of trying to make it sound really fun so my family will help me... I am so pathetic...lol. However, the carnival should be fun, complete with cake walk, bean-bag toss, homemade skee ball, and anything else I can think of.
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Last Friday I had my performance review with my boss. She said that when I first applied for the job and came in for the interview the thing that stuck out most about me was how gracious I was. She said that I have an eloquence and grace that will allow me to conquer the world. I was astonished.
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One of my managers just gave me a white cheddar cheese puff to try. It was delicious! Yesterday he had us try little treats made of sesame seeds and honey. He just moved into the office across from me and I think I am beginning to like the arrangement. :)
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I am having a hard time with friends who can't hang out with me because they have homework. I have a couple of friends who went back to college after I had already graduated and I just can't get a handle on that. I feel like we should all be in the same place. However, this will probably never be the case. Eventually they will be done with homework, but I will be in Grad school and have my own homework. This is a bad cycle. Who needs homework anyway?
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I am wearing a scarf today, my first for the Fall/Winter 2009 season. It makes me feel trendy. :) To top that off, I also wore my new, white, wool coat to work. Pure Happiness! :)

Cast Away

As you may or may not know, on Monday I got my cast taken off (hallelujah!). The doctor was pleased with the progress and warned me to not do anything stupid or clumsy. He obviously doesn't know me very well.

The doctor had stitched it up using traditional thread, rather than dissolving stitches to reduce the scarring. I am embarrassed to say, that when the doctor pulled them out, it hurt more than a little bit and I honestly nearly fainted right there. The doctor was talking to me about what I was supposed to do and then he suddenly stopped and ask me if I was all right. I really wasn't, so he made me lie down, jokingly telling me that it was bad for business to have patients fainting in the waiting room.

After regaining some dignity, I left. Later that night, once the pain had gone down a little bit, we took off the wrap to see how it looked. Honestly, I don't know what to say other than it was disgusting. We decided to take a picture so that all of you who missed out would still get to see. However, most of the pictures are too graphic, so I will just show one from a different angle. I had bled a lot and my foot was dyed kinda red and the skin was majorly dry. You can also see where the doc wrote "yes" on my foot to reassure himself he was cutting the correct one.



Here is a better image after we soaked and bathed it, not nearly so disgusting.



For now, I have to keep my ankle wrapped up and protected. It is still swollen, so my normal shoes don't fit. Luckily I have a very fashionable (so sarcastic) surgical shoe to wear until I can force my foot in a shoe. My recovery is going well, I just have to continue being careful with how far I push myself and hopefully I will be good as new soon.

And finally, here is a pic of me on Alexander's birthday, 2 days after surgery.

Some Animal Magnetism

Yesterday my darling, sweet husband indulged me and took me to the zoo to see the baby animals. I had been begging for weeks, but he had been reluctant due to my being a cripple. I convinced him that we could rent a motorized wheelchair and he consented. So, bright and early, (11:00am) we headed up to the zoo. The weather was perfect, warm with a light breeze. I was VERY excited. I refused the crutches knowing that it wouldn't be a far walk to the fancy wheelchair and hobbled up to the ticket window. After purchasing our tickets we sidled over to the bored teenager working the wheelchair place.

Bored Teenage Boy: "Uh... we don't have any... I think... Yeah, uh, you can get the regular one and maybe like trade it in later if one shows up and just pay the difference."
Alexander: "Oh, will they let us do that?"
Bored Teenage Boy: "Actually, I don't really know."
Alexander: "I see. Well, I guess we will just take what you have then."

He was my hero! He was willing to brave the hills and the trails pushing me up and down just because he loved me! I need to write a ballad of that feat.

We saw the three baby tigers, the snow leopard cub, the baby giraffe, and the baby elephant (plus all the regular sized animals). They were so adorable!

Here are some of our favorite pictures:


He was close enough to touch!


BABY SNOW LEOPARD!! :)


I am in love with the Red Pandas!


Hey, I'm just chillin'!


Hey Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom!


Boy this skin is itchy!


Love these mud baths!


Peek-a-boo!


Surprise, it's wet!


Umm...Help? This guy was a hoot!