Happy Birthday Alexander!

My Alexander turns 29 today. I could go on and on about how wonderful he is but I don’t want to bore you to death or embarrass Alexander too much. Here are just a few reasons (in no particular order) why I am so thankful to have him in my life:

He makes me laugh every day
He is one of the most intelligent people I know but also one of the most humble
He loves to teach others what he learns and he teaches me something new every day
He has great compassion for others, including animals
He is slow to anger
He loves music and he hums when he’s happy
He has the most gorgeous blue eyes
He is very talented at imitating accents and I find it very entertaining
He has a child-like excitement that is infectious
He can make a mean spaghetti dinner
He loves and takes care of the dog even though he is allergic to her

Happy Birthday darling!

Deborah

Last Saturday I broke all my own rules and expectations and went with some of my co-workers to participate in the Rex Lee Run. This is a 5k/10k run/walk fundraiser that raises money for cancer research. Participants are also welcome to contribute extra in the name of a cancer victim or survivor and wear their name in the race.

I have never participated in a 5k before, not even walking. It goes against my most firmly held belief that other people don't want to see me exercise. However, since I have broken this rule quite consistently lately by attending my aerobic classes I figured I could walk a couple miles. No sweat, right? Well...mostly. I forgot my ankle brace and thus ended up slowing my very nice friends down. I did surprising well without the brace, but I was sore later.

My real motivation in doing the race was for my husband and honoring his mother in the race. I know a lot of wonderful people that I could have honored instead, but I felt they would understand.

Alexander's mother was Deborah Alvord Strub. She was an extremely accomplished classically trained operatic soprano and had a double master's from ASU in music and pedagogy.

After finishing at ASU, she traveled to England for four years to study voice under a very famous instructor. One night she preformed at the Hyde Park Chapel and was so outstanding that a certain young man, Peter, in the audience couldn't leave without speaking to her. Peter courted her the rest of the time she was in England but she was forced to leave when her visa expired. Distraught that he hadn't proposed while she was still there, Peter proposed to Deborah in a letter and mailed it to Arizona where she was staying with her family. When the letter arrived her family tried to convince her not to open it (they were afraid he would break her heart again). However, she did open it and accepted his proposal. He then came to the US to marry her.

Soon after they were married they had Alexander and then 6 years after that, Sebastian. Deborah was a devoted mother who magnified her talents as a voice instructor in the community as well as an organist and choir director in her church for many years.

When Alexander was a teenager she was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, an incredibly painful and incurable disease. It starts as a tumor with no symptoms and by the time symptoms have developed enough for it to be found, it is usually too late for survival. Because of this, 95% of individuals diagnosed with pancreatic cancer will die within 5 years.

Deborah fought a brave battle, undergoing all sorts of treatments to stave off the inevitable. Regardless of her illness, she encouraged Alexander to go on a mission and so he left in October 2001. He was blessed to be serving in the Salt Lake City mission under Pres. Richard Hinckley (son of Gordon B. Hinckley). When his mother was very close to the end of her life, Alexander was given the special option to spend a few days with her living or to attend her funeral. He chose to see her and was quickly sent down to spend a few days with his family. His mother was so proud of her missionary and only lamented that she hadn't had time to teach him how to be a good husband.

What Deborah may not have realized is that with her entire life she taught her sons how to be great men. She infused Alexander with her love of music and family and taught him kindness, sincerity, humility, and compassion. She also encouraged him to go after his dreams and to take advantage of the wonderful things life has to offer. She taught him true forgiveness and repentance as she spent many months praying so that she would be ready to face the next step in her progression after death. Of course, with all of these wonderful traits, Alexander didn't need to be taught how to be a good husband, he was already great.

Deborah passed away on February 4, 2002 after battling cancer for more than 2 years. She left this earth too early for me to ever meet her, but I imagine that we would have been wonderful friends and that she would have helped me continue my own pursuits by teaching me voice and piano. I think the best compliment Alexander has ever given me is, "My mother would have really liked you". The first time I met Alexander's grandmother she played a recording of Deborah singing "O Divine Redeemer". I've never heard it's equal and it brought tears to my eyes.

So Deborah, in the time between now and when I meet you face to face, I promise to take care of your boy, Alexander, and to love him as much as you would have wished. The best way for me to honor your memory is to love those that you loved and to take care of them when you can't. I pray I can live up to the task.

To Kiss and Tell

There has been quite a bit activity in my family regarding boyfriends, girlfriends, and dating in general. The biggest gossip concerns my youngest sister who has a new "boyfriend-ish guy" and had her first kiss this week.

When I talked with Nattie about her first kiss, I asked her how it was, did he have bad breath, were his lips chapped, was he sloppy? It was immediately obvious that I had kissed some losers in the past. I loved her answer though, so typical of the first kiss la-la land, "It was really good. I didn't notice anything else."

I have had some first kiss drama myself. On high school graduation day, we had a big party, like most schools do. A boy I had been friends with and with whom I had gone on several dates was there. We spent a good hour just talking on the grass. As the night waned on, I was getting more tired, but also more giddy/crazy (think: teenager). My friends were watching us from a distance and this guy thought it would be funny to stage kiss and then pretend we had really kissed. I personally thought it would be funnier to actually kiss, but I didn't say that. So, because I was silly and wanted him to like me, I agreed. He made me promise not to tell my friends it was a fake. Looking back, I totally don't get why we did it. The next morning my friends were all gabbing about our kiss when my friend Mel pulled me aside, looked me in the eye, and said, "You are a liar." And because I'm not a very good liar, my secret was out.

My actual first kiss was when I was a sophomore in college. I was 19 and completely flattered by a guy I had been dating for about 2 weeks. After one of those long days at school, he walked me to my car and kissed me. I thought it was good at the time, but 2 weeks later I wished I had never kissed him.

I like the story of my husband's first kiss best. We were on our first date and had spent the entire afternoon and evening together. We had taken a walk around campus and had ended up sitting on the bench by the bell tower. Alexander was sharing his heartache about his mom and family and I was overwhelmed at some of the things I felt comfortable enough to share with him. At one point we grew quiet, his arm around me as he stared off into the valley of lights. Suddenly, he turned and kissed me right on the lips. I was surprised and I distinctly remember the thought crossing my mind, "Do I want to be kissing him? Yes, yes, I do!" When we pulled apart, he got a shy grin on his face and said, "Well, I've never done that before".

"What?" I asked, "Never kissed someone on a first date before?"

"No, I mean, I've never kissed a girl at all before". Frankly, I was flabbergasted because his kiss was really nice. Not sloppy, not too long or too short, no chapped lips or bad breath, just really nice. I think that's why I married him. ;)

I think I would like again to experience that rush of adrenaline, of surprise, glee, adoration, joy, and giddiness that comes to a girl the first time she kisses a man she really likes. While I love every single kiss my darling husband gives me, it doesn't carry the same feeling of miraculous anxiety that our first kiss together did.

This quote brings that feeling to life again:

I ran up the door, opened the stairs, said my pajamas and put on my prayers - turned off my bed, tumbled into my light, and all because he kissed me good-night! ~Author Unknown

Four Years Ago Today...

It was a beautiful Saturday and I had talked my boss into letting me get off work early to go to the last day of the Ancient Mediterranean exhibit at BYU. By 3:00 I had pulled into the parking lot and was ready to do some exciting historical studies.

Waiting in line at the ticket booth, I noticed a handsome, blond guy in front of me. He was wearing an expensive green polo style shirt and looked comfortable with his blue backpack in his hand. After paying the $3.00 fee, I walked in and was surrounded by the soft light and hushed voices that seem to always accompany our ancient treasures. I was greeted by archeological finds from Ancient Rome and was quickly immersed into my own personal study of each object on display. Lips pursed and brows knitted together, I barely noticed the people around me. Suddenly, 3 small children rushed by me, delighting in the opportunity to explore and play. Their loud laughter broke my concentration and I realized that I had been following the handsome young man I mentioned earlier. After peering in the same cases at the same time, I felt I should break the silence and acknowledge his existence.

"I don't think all these figurines were used for 'religious purposes'. I bet these were just their action figures."

He was kind enough to laugh and we started talking. I tried to show off a little bit of my historical knowledge when we came up the Minoans section (since I had written a large paper on the Minoans) and was surprised when he knew just as much as me. Further conversation proved that he could correctly pronounce Greek and Egyptian words and knew fascinating tidbits about everything in the entire exhibit. I was impressed and so when he invited me over to his apartment to watch a movie he had made, I agreed.

The movie showed a silly side of this too-good-to-be-true guy and I enjoyed getting to know that aspect of his personality. When it was over, we continued our conversation about anything and everything. Right as I was feeling awkward over whether to stay or go, he asked me out to dinner at PF Chang's. By the time dinner was over, I was clearly head-over-heels for this guy. I didn't want to leave so when he suggested a movie, I quickly accepted. We saw Hitch and laughed so hard we cried. Later we went for a walk around BYU. Surprising both of us, he kissed me in front of the Bell Tower and I knew right then that this was something special.

Seventeen months later on October 1st, 2006, the cute blond guy took me up Provo Canyon to Nunn's Park and proposed to me. We were later married on January 5, 2007.

Although it is not our wedding anniversary, I have always considered June 4 to be a very special day for me. It was the day I was blessed to meet my sweetheart, Alexander, and the day we unofficially started our life together. So, thank you darling for these 4 years of bliss and happiness. I will love you forever!